Dana
2004-10-24 23:44:37 UTC
http://www.secularislam.org/women/nightmare.htm
Girls' Nightmare in Muslim Families: Forced Marriages in Europe
By Azam Kamguian
Every year, many thousands of young girls, living in Muslim inhabited
communities in European countries face forced marriages. In Muslim immigrant
families, often from the Middle East, North Africa and Turkey, teenage girls
are struggling against the pressure of tribal culture and Islamic customs
imposed on them by their parents; and forced marriage is often their fate.
A women group against sexual mutilation of women, formed in 1980s in France,
estimates that more than 30,000 young girls have been involved in forced
marriage since 1990. In Britain, south Asian women groups have records of
numerous cases of young girls who have been forced to marry by their
parents.
This nightmare started in 1990s, when young girls from Muslim immigrant
families in Europe reached their early teenage years and were considered
mature and marriageable by their parents. Teenage girls from Turkish
immigrant families are especially under intense pressure. According to
statistics provided by women groups in France and Britain, in 1990s, 43% of
girls from Turkish families, and 36% of girls from South Asian families in
Britain, have been involved in forced marriages.
Forced marriage is a taboo, untouchable, and is performed secretly. The
secret is revealed when the girl suddenly behaves strangely, gets isolated
and is not doing well at school. She often breaks the silence and talks
about her painful ordeal with a friend or some teacher at school. In this
way, she unveils the bitter reality that is awaiting her. Once the forced
marriage becomes known outside the family, the real fight starts. Zahia
Hasan, chair of a women association; "Women's Voice" in France, and a victim
of forced marriages says: " it is a painful experience, it was a nightmare
for me for many years. I was deeply ashamed, I lied about my life and hid my
misery"
Girls, who reveal the terrible secret outside family, often clash with their
parents and leave home. They even feel ashamed and guilty of revealing the
secret and having betrayed their families and relatives. Many young girls
under a heavy family and community pressure undergo forced marriage because
they don't want to lose their families and relatives. Forced marriage is
their inevitable fate, because there is no government or social support
network to protect their rights. Forced marriages are practiced in France,
Britain, Scandinavian countries and among Turkish community in Germany.
Early marriage is another aspect of forced marriages. Girls, 15 or younger,
undergo forced marriages, are considered as part - times wives, continue to
live with their parents and go to school, living with their dark and heavy
secret.
In most cases, these marriages end to divorce; according to statistics; two
out of three. Rape, teenage pregnancy, disrupted education; nervous
breakdown, neurological disorders and suicide are all fruits of forced
marriages for young girls. But, their families insist that their act is
decent and good for the girls. They defend it by referring to Islam and
Islamic Law; according to which, a girl cannot marry without the consent of
her father, and in the absence of her father, that of her paternal
grandfather. These families, not only haven't been affected by advanced and
modern culture in Europe, but also are out of tune with the current
situation in their countries of origin, where social and cultural norms and
values have moved forward. By marrying their young girls in this way, Muslim
parents try to block the integration of their daughters into a modern and
European life style. As a result, parents deprive their own children of
enjoying the civil rights and individual freedom entitled to them. They harm
their children physically, emotionally and psychologically.
Under French law, a forced marriage can be annulled if there has been lack
of consent. But if the marriage ceremony is a customary one, the French
courts cannot act. However, magistrates can intervene before a marriage
takes place if an underage girl, who has broken with her family, is in
physical danger.
Under the guise of respecting 'others' traditions and Islamic values, the
legal system and authorities tend to overlook forced marriages. They say:
"there are customs and religion, which are different from those, practiced
here. It is not for us to judge these traditions and religion, unless the
young girls are in physical danger and there should be proof for that."
Consider a young girl under legal age, undergoing the ordeal of a forced
marriage, clashing with her family, without a legal help or a supporting
social network, who must provide proof against her own parents in the court,
in order to get rid of this nightmare. Isn't it inhumane and shameful? What
is respectable in this misery imposed on these innocent young girls? What is
respectable in destroying and wasting lives, hopes and dreams of these
girls? And of course, both 'Western' and Eastern 'intellectuals',
shamelessly, tell us that "to talk of forced marriages is an Euro - centric
way of looking at things."
Young girls in Muslim inhabited communities in Europe are victims of tribal
and Islamic values and traditions, as well as a racist treatment by
government authorities, intellectuals and mainstream media. These girls are
born and have grown up in European countries, and should be entitled to all
rights and freedom like other European citizens. Forced marriages must be
prohibited by law as rape; and mental and emotional damages to teenage
girls.
Girls from Muslim families are not the belongings of their families; they
should be treated as equal citizens. The governments and the legal system
must protect them from the harm caused by their parents. Society is duty
bound to help the victims of forced marriages to recover from the emotional,
mental and physical damages they suffer.
Girls' Nightmare in Muslim Families: Forced Marriages in Europe
By Azam Kamguian
Every year, many thousands of young girls, living in Muslim inhabited
communities in European countries face forced marriages. In Muslim immigrant
families, often from the Middle East, North Africa and Turkey, teenage girls
are struggling against the pressure of tribal culture and Islamic customs
imposed on them by their parents; and forced marriage is often their fate.
A women group against sexual mutilation of women, formed in 1980s in France,
estimates that more than 30,000 young girls have been involved in forced
marriage since 1990. In Britain, south Asian women groups have records of
numerous cases of young girls who have been forced to marry by their
parents.
This nightmare started in 1990s, when young girls from Muslim immigrant
families in Europe reached their early teenage years and were considered
mature and marriageable by their parents. Teenage girls from Turkish
immigrant families are especially under intense pressure. According to
statistics provided by women groups in France and Britain, in 1990s, 43% of
girls from Turkish families, and 36% of girls from South Asian families in
Britain, have been involved in forced marriages.
Forced marriage is a taboo, untouchable, and is performed secretly. The
secret is revealed when the girl suddenly behaves strangely, gets isolated
and is not doing well at school. She often breaks the silence and talks
about her painful ordeal with a friend or some teacher at school. In this
way, she unveils the bitter reality that is awaiting her. Once the forced
marriage becomes known outside the family, the real fight starts. Zahia
Hasan, chair of a women association; "Women's Voice" in France, and a victim
of forced marriages says: " it is a painful experience, it was a nightmare
for me for many years. I was deeply ashamed, I lied about my life and hid my
misery"
Girls, who reveal the terrible secret outside family, often clash with their
parents and leave home. They even feel ashamed and guilty of revealing the
secret and having betrayed their families and relatives. Many young girls
under a heavy family and community pressure undergo forced marriage because
they don't want to lose their families and relatives. Forced marriage is
their inevitable fate, because there is no government or social support
network to protect their rights. Forced marriages are practiced in France,
Britain, Scandinavian countries and among Turkish community in Germany.
Early marriage is another aspect of forced marriages. Girls, 15 or younger,
undergo forced marriages, are considered as part - times wives, continue to
live with their parents and go to school, living with their dark and heavy
secret.
In most cases, these marriages end to divorce; according to statistics; two
out of three. Rape, teenage pregnancy, disrupted education; nervous
breakdown, neurological disorders and suicide are all fruits of forced
marriages for young girls. But, their families insist that their act is
decent and good for the girls. They defend it by referring to Islam and
Islamic Law; according to which, a girl cannot marry without the consent of
her father, and in the absence of her father, that of her paternal
grandfather. These families, not only haven't been affected by advanced and
modern culture in Europe, but also are out of tune with the current
situation in their countries of origin, where social and cultural norms and
values have moved forward. By marrying their young girls in this way, Muslim
parents try to block the integration of their daughters into a modern and
European life style. As a result, parents deprive their own children of
enjoying the civil rights and individual freedom entitled to them. They harm
their children physically, emotionally and psychologically.
Under French law, a forced marriage can be annulled if there has been lack
of consent. But if the marriage ceremony is a customary one, the French
courts cannot act. However, magistrates can intervene before a marriage
takes place if an underage girl, who has broken with her family, is in
physical danger.
Under the guise of respecting 'others' traditions and Islamic values, the
legal system and authorities tend to overlook forced marriages. They say:
"there are customs and religion, which are different from those, practiced
here. It is not for us to judge these traditions and religion, unless the
young girls are in physical danger and there should be proof for that."
Consider a young girl under legal age, undergoing the ordeal of a forced
marriage, clashing with her family, without a legal help or a supporting
social network, who must provide proof against her own parents in the court,
in order to get rid of this nightmare. Isn't it inhumane and shameful? What
is respectable in this misery imposed on these innocent young girls? What is
respectable in destroying and wasting lives, hopes and dreams of these
girls? And of course, both 'Western' and Eastern 'intellectuals',
shamelessly, tell us that "to talk of forced marriages is an Euro - centric
way of looking at things."
Young girls in Muslim inhabited communities in Europe are victims of tribal
and Islamic values and traditions, as well as a racist treatment by
government authorities, intellectuals and mainstream media. These girls are
born and have grown up in European countries, and should be entitled to all
rights and freedom like other European citizens. Forced marriages must be
prohibited by law as rape; and mental and emotional damages to teenage
girls.
Girls from Muslim families are not the belongings of their families; they
should be treated as equal citizens. The governments and the legal system
must protect them from the harm caused by their parents. Society is duty
bound to help the victims of forced marriages to recover from the emotional,
mental and physical damages they suffer.